Holistic Chef

Love letter to my higher self ❤

“So the last shall be first, and the first last: for many be called, but few chosen.”
Matthew 20:16
 
Dear higher self, my beloved ancestors both known and unknown, my spirit guides and my esoteric family……
 
If you would’ve told me 10 years ago how peaceful, powerful, blessed and abundant my life would be right now I wouldn’t have believed you. In fact I was always reminded of how special I am, how magickal I am, how beautiful I am or how pure my heart is many times throughout my life from childhood to adulthood from strangers, earth angels etc. I just couldn’t see what others saw in me. They saw beautiful lights radiating from my aura , a massive and highly unique caring heart, passion for helping others, a big bright future ahead of me, unconditional love for life and people…. But all I saw when I looked at myself (If and when I had the courage to stare at my reflection) was shame, unattractiveness, a unhealed inner child, alllll my insecurities and any and all the pain, emptiness and hurt I ever endured since arriving on this planet 9/18/1990. My journey up until this point have been filled with lessons, many of which I had to repeat several times because I’m hardheaded asffff🤦‍♀️, including toxic relationships both personal and professional, homelessness, putting everyone else over my self, being a pushover, lack of self love, abuse, procrastination etc. Healing is one of the most difficult things required for each and every one of us. Yes you deal with resurfaced issues such as childhood traumas, sexual traumas, poverty, things we intentionally and unintentionally sweep under the rug, voids from absentee parents…. I can only imagine the struggles and disappointments we ALL individually and collectively experienced together in this life time and the lifetimes before. I am here to be a witness, A vessel for you, a sign of the universe that no matter what you went through, no matter what toxicity you were born into, no matter what pains you felt in your heart… None of that is a reflection of who YOU are as a person and what you mean to me and this world! That man or woman who hurt you rather it be your mother, your father, your aunt, your husband, your ex boyfriend, the person who took your innocence as a child, your uncle who knew he had no business touching you in the first place! That has everything to do with them and what they are and absolutely nothing to do with who you have the potential to be! I had to get to a point where I could barely fucking walk or even function normally with all the baggage I been walking around carrying all these years! All these lifetimes! Nevertheless every 👏single👏step👏 of the way I had assistance from my spiritual army. All the times I thought I was alone I was surrounded by love and protection in the midst of the storms…. I dedicate this letter to you to thank you for your unconditional love, guidance, gifts and strength in walking and sometimes (most times) carrying me on my journey to self love, discovery and acceptance of myself and who I am entirely.
“When you are evolving to your higher self, the road seems lonely but you’re simply shedding the energies that no longer match the frequency of your destiny “.
Model: ChiNique Da Healer Stylist: Chefnique_chicago & Staladon_  Photographer: Iamalmightyazul
#chicagobread #chefnique #higherself #goldie #yoni #healing #model #explore #starseed #divinefeminine #divineguidance #ancestors #universe #144 #chicago #miami #shaman

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